Walking along this dirt path of life I alternate between dreaming of the interesting things I will see or people I will meet, and stopping to enjoy the flowers and lovely views along the way. Some times I have company with me, and occasionally I choose to walk alone. However I am coming up to a clearing with a massive cross roads according to my map (aka the stamp in my passport that says my visa will run out in Nov) I know there are great decisions I must make at this point in the trail, and I am dreading it, as I’m the only one who can make the choice. I know that my choice will affect my future journey and therefore the woman I become.
So to get others involved, hopefully make this less daunting, and encourage supportive company I am posting my thoughts on my blog for open discussion. I will however ask one thing of you… Please comment cautiously as I am STRESSIN, and it is hugely important to me to make a good choice. Most of you will know I am easily persuaded because I think so highly of your opinions, so be kind in your votes for my future.
To stay in Scotland:
I will need a new visa. I can go back to Uni, or find a job that will get my work visa. Getting a work visa is problematic at best, although I will send out lots of applications just in case I get lucky. Going back to Uni would cost me £1700 per year, but I can save that much working over the summer so no loan would be required. I would either be studying Theatre Production (aka directing for stage) or Film studies (aka directing for film). I did submit my application so we will see. If you wish to read my personal statement it is also on the blog.
I don’t necessarily believe in studying something just to get a visa, that would make it an expensive visa, but these are subjects I am interested in a bit. The big question is weather or not I feel I need more formal education, or weather or not I feel I have all the skills I need to pursue my career with out it? Or perhaps I should think to myself, if I had permanent right to remain, would I be going back to school or trying to start my career?
Going back to the States:
Would mean I have to move, but the bigger worry is where would I go? Do I have a place that I call home there? Would I be able to settle, and make a place for myself that I feel happy and comfortable in? I don’t just want to end up somewhere because I got kicked out of my home and had no where else to go. NY comes to mind, but I don’t know how I feel about that yet. For more info on NY, go see the NYC Pilgrimage post.
I could run off and ignore either option:
Backpacking across Europe is definitely my preferred option but when my 8 week tour is done I will have to return home again and I will need to know where that home is. So although this is the most fun of all the options, really it only delays my decisions rather than answers them for me.
Any ways, your thoughts are welcome!!!!!!
About Me
- Clarice Michael
- Hmmmm. Im cool, odd, flirtatious, shy, energetic, optimistic, and I just love to DANCE!
3 comments:
Hey sis,
First of all, there are really no wrong answers here. Choices have ramifications sure, but as long as you remain flexible you can always change your mind later.
I won't answer your question for you, but I'll offer some reflections which you may completely ignore.
Backpacking through Europe (or anywhere) would be awesome! The journey may not just be a delay either. Not all who wander are lost. You may just find what you're looking for on the road. Maybe.
As for Uni/work my opinion is that you should do what you feel you want to be doing. Uni is really an end unto itself, not a means to an end. Yes, some careers require education to get into, but by and large going to university isn't about getting you somewhere else. Go to university if you really love the subject and want to study it, want to be in that environment, surrounded by students etc... Otherwise go into a kind of work you love. Really this is a choice between different kinds of work, since Uni is a job too. Just ask - do I want my job to be reading and writing or something else?
I would treat location in kind of the same way. Where do you really want to be? Then make that happen. If it's Scotland then it's worth it to find a way to get a Visa, but if you don't really care about staying in Scotland then it's silly to try and make the visa happen. Once you know what you want to DO (aka uni or work) then ask where do I want to do that?
That's how I'd approach the decision, anyway.
*hugs*
have you got this blog set to email you your comments?
Backpacking across Europe ins't delaying anything (necessarily). Aric's CRC was a life changing experience. You trip through Europe could be the same thing.
But then again, so could you pending trip to NY.
I don't know if there is any way to tell when an event is going to be life altering. As a parent, we often plan things, events, occasions for/with our kids in the hopes they will be memorable. But it is obvious, listening to both you and Aric that the events of your childhood had very different effects on who you are - and the events you remember are often not the ones we, as your parents, thought would be the most special.
What should you do?
I wish I had an answer... I wish I even had a good suggestion. I am not sure the answer is ready to be heard yet...
Whatever the case, Mom and I will always be there for you.
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